A Hero’s Haven Read online

  They sipped in silence.

  She snuck another glance his direction, completely at a loss for what to do next. Mistake. He was staring, and now she couldn’t look away. She’d been wrong about the coffee color. His eyes were more like mahogany or maybe rosewood. She tore her eyes from his face, seeking her guitar. Damn. His eyes were the color of her guitar. A thousand butterflies took flight at the realization.

  Cash cleared his throat. “So do you have laryngitis?”

  There he went, looking concerned again. Like he cared. But he couldn’t possibly… She nodded, and stood, walking to the table where her notebook lay. She picked up her pen and wrote.

  I hurt my voice. My doctor said I shouldn’t talk until my next appointment.

  She handed him the paper, watching him closely as he read it. When he lifted it, his eyes were full of empathy. “I bet that’s been hard.”

  Total understatement. She nodded.

  “When’s your next appointment?”

  She held up two fingers.

  “Days?”

  She shook her head.

  “Oh, weeks.”

  She nodded.

  Cash grinned up at her. “Well then, it looks like I’m doing all the talking until then.”

  She grinned back, his smile infectious.

  Cash drained the last of his coffee and set the cup on the floor. “Thanks for the coffee.” He stood, coming toe to toe with her. Kate’s brain buzzed with the scent of him. As she tilted her head to meet his eyes, her throat parched. There was more than concern in his friendly, brown eyes. There was heat, and her body answered with a thrill. He raised a hand, sliding a thumb down her cheek, barely touching her and yet managing to leave a trail of fire that sizzled through her body. She breathed in sharply, and he immediately dropped his hand, looking chagrined.

  “If you need anything… Kate…” He looked funny saying her name. “I’m right next door. See you ’round?”

  Before she could answer with a nod and a smile, he’d stepped out the door, moving surprisingly fast and light on his feet for a man so large.

  Yeah. See you ’round, Cash.

  CHAPTER 8

  Cash practically jogged away from the trailer, setting out for the main house. What had he been thinking? He’d been mesmerized by those magic green eyes, that’s what. He hadn’t meant to scare her. He’d been as surprised by his touch as she had. And the way she looked when she answered the door… he’d been entirely unprepared for the effect she had on him. Sweet and sexy and utterly kissable, all bundled up in her oversized terrycloth bathrobe and fuzzy socks, hair in tousled waves.

  But he couldn’t go there with her. Not ever. At some point, she’d put two and two together and figure out that he’d failed her once before. And he couldn’t bear to see how her eyes would condemn him when the ugly truth came out. No, he’d just have to keep a tight rein on himself. Besides, he was here at the ranch to work. Ultimately to help others struggling with the same things he did. Kissing would be a distraction.

  He closed his eyes as the thought of that lovely distraction settled with an ache deep in his balls. It had been so long since he’d felt any kind of affection for a woman, let alone desire. He couldn’t let Kaycee awaken those long-dead places. It might be torture, but he’d survived worse.

  Elaine met him on the porch of the main house. “Morning,” she said brightly, looking relaxed and happy.

  Cash’s heart gave a lurch as he thought about what Kaycee might look like after an obvious night of bedding.

  “Sterling and Travis are out in the far north pasture pulling stumps and repairing fences. They said for you to join them.”

  “Great. Is there anything you need me to do here before I go?”

  “Nah. Kate will help me after she exercises the other horses.”

  So she helped with domestic stuff too? That made no sense. If the queen of country had lost her voice and was convalescing, why work? Why not convalesce at a spa in Desert Springs, or wherever fancy people went for R&R? There must be something else going on.

  “See you for supper, then.” Cash turned and headed for the barn. Halfway there, he stopped in his tracks. Was there another stalker? That would explain the name change and the dark hair. Dread pooled in his stomach. If that was the case, then chances were Travis already knew, and the less he said about it, the better. Travis must be keeping that intel on a need to know status. In which case, he didn’t need to know. But he’d be on his guard. He damned well wasn’t going to let Kaycee down a second time.

  By the time the men returned for dinner Cash had worked himself into a good place. Travis was right, sweat labor did wonders for the mind. Held the demons at bay. Today his hands hadn’t shaken once.

  “Join us for dinner?” Travis asked everyone.

  “No thanks, my parents are expecting me,” said Sterling.

  Travis looked at Cash expectantly.

  He’d put them off the night before, and Elaine’s cooking was better than his own. They’d ask questions if he refused again. “Sure, thanks.”

  “Leave Samson tied up here. Kate will tend to him.”

  Cash shook his head. “Nope. I’ll get him settled and be in.” Travis didn’t understand his attachment to the horse, but caring for Samson grounded him in a way nothing else did. Samson seemed to sense when he was at the breaking point. Cash couldn’t explain it, but it was like the horse knew his struggles. As he entered the barn, he heard the scrape of the shovel at the end of the aisle. His pulse kicked up. “Kate?”

  Her head popped out of a stall, and she waved, giving him an easy smile. Warmth bloomed in his chest as he turned to loop Samson’s reins around a post. “Good day today?” He called out before remembering there would be no answer. “Just give me one thump for yes, two for no,” he amended.

  Her answering thump brought a smile to his face.

  “Me, too.” He began to comb Samson, working out the mud from his coat. “We were up in the far north pasture pulling stumps and fixing the fences. Did Elaine tell you we’re planning to bring in Longhorns later in the year?”

  Thump, thump.

  “Once we get the foreman’s house and the rancher’s quarters built, and we raise some money, that’s the plan.” He liked the plan. And today had been the first time he’d seen himself staying long-term. “Sounds nice, doesn’t it?”

  She didn’t answer right away, but then gave a quiet thump, as if somehow thinking about the future made her sad.

  The words came out before he could stop them. “Does thinking about that make you sad?” A quieter thump followed a much longer pause. Giving Samson a pat, Cash walked down the aisle, stopping at the empty stall Kaycee was filling with fresh hay. “Hey,” he said gently, bracing an arm on the post. Her hair fell in front of her face, like a curtain. “Look at me, Kate.”

  The grief in her luminous eyes punched him in the gut, and the urge to go to her overwhelmed him. Before he could stop himself, he spoke. “You look like you could use a hug.”

  Her eyes widened in surprise, and he instantly regretted his words. Fuck, he hadn’t meant to scare her. She just looked so alone. But before he could backpedal, she melted into him, burying her face against his chest, shoulders shaking. He brought a hand to her hair, marveling at its softness. She was so fragile. And his own heart twisted painfully at her tears. He hated seeing her this way. “Hey now. Wanna talk about it?”

  She made a funny little noise and shook her head. Poor thing. How could he ease her pain? He didn’t know what else to do, so he held her close, tucked under his chin, and murmured to her the way he did when he’d first gotten to know Samson until the tears subsided. At last, she gave a little shudder and raised her head.

  Kate was painfully beautiful, eyes red and puffy, cheeks shiny and wet. Moving instinctually, he wiped her tears from her cheeks with this thumbs before pulling her close again. “If you wanna talk, or write, I’m here.” He couldn’t offer much, but he could at least be a friend.

&nb
sp; She tilted her face, mouthing thank you. The urge to kiss her shot through him with the kick of a grenade launcher. He stepped back, heart pounding painfully. No matter how sweet and kissable she seemed, kissing Kaycee was out of the question. “How about I help you finish the chores?” he asked when he found his voice again.

  He’d have to content himself with her smile. Being in this sweet woman’s presence would have to be enough. It was all he deserved. As they quietly worked their way through the chores, Cash’s brain tumbled. The woman in front of him was the furthest thing from Kaycee Starr. Kaycee had an entourage. Big hair and an even bigger persona. Kate was astonishingly, surprisingly… human.

  It surprised him too, how quickly they slipped into a daily routine, morning coffee and a shared walk to the main house, then shared chores in the evening. He half expected her to shoo him out of the barn every night, but she never did. Maybe she liked his company? He liked hers, and not just because she was quiet. He’d never been much of a talker, something his ex-wife had repeatedly harped on him for. But he relaxed around Kate in a way he never had with anyone else and found he didn’t mind carrying the conversation.

  “So Kate,” Cash called one evening from the stall he was mucking. “You like cards?”

  A thump came from the other end of the barn.

  “You like poker?”

  Thump, thump.

  “Go Fish?”

  THUMP, THUMP.

  A laugh rumbled through him. “Okay, okay, I get it loud and clear. You hate Go Fish.” He pushed the wheelbarrow out of the barn, dumping the contents on the manure pile, and returned, filling a cart with clean hay. Curiosity got the better of him. “So no poker or Go Fish. What’s your game?”

  Thump,thump,thump,thump.

  “Yeah, I know, no open-ended questions from across the barn.” Damn, it felt good to laugh. “Just think about it.”

  She stepped out of a stall, holding her hands in a heart. For a moment he forgot to breathe. Her ponytail had come loose, and little bits of hay stuck out in places. Her eyes sparkled with silent laughter. When he found his voice, it came out too gritty. “Hearts, huh? Can’t play that with two people.” At least not with cards. His heart was becoming dangerously involved, and he couldn’t seem to avoid it, no matter how hard he tried. “Ever play rummy?”

  A wicked gleam entered her eye as she gave him a mercenary smile.

  Jesus, she was hot when her confidence showed. A familiar ache returned to his balls. He cleared his throat. “I take it you’re familiar with the game?”

  She popped her eyebrows high.

  “Oh, so you’re an expert, huh?”

  Her look said she was all that and more. “Think you can take me?” He challenged softly, a plan forming in his head as he stepped toward her.

  Her eyes lit, and she held her ground.

  “That so?” He stood within reach of her, hands itching to touch her. He settled for pulling the hay from her hair. “We’ll have to play sometime.” He forced himself to turn around and return to his chores, but he didn’t miss the flash of disappointment in her eyes when he stepped back. Did she feel it too? This pull? The urge to spend more time together?

  He’d be a fool to pursue it. Nothing good would come from acting on his impulses. No matter how strongly they called to him. But still…

  CHAPTER 9

  In spite of his best intentions, an hour after they’d finished chores, he found himself standing in front of the freezer case at Millie’s Organic Grocery. Women liked ice-cream, right? Everyone knew that. Cash’s insides tensed. What if she hated ice-cream? What if he picked the wrong flavor? Shit, this was a horrible idea. He should turn around right now.

  “Can I help you?” A soft voice asked.

  He spun, coming face to face with a tiny, curly-haired blonde wearing an enormous name tag with the name Millie. She must own the store. “Uh, no.” Aww hell, who was he kidding? His neck burned. “Yes. I need some ice-cream.”

  Millie flashed him a smile. “What do you like?”

  “Anything.” He couldn’t even remember the last time he’d had ice-cream. He remembered walking with his mom every Saturday afternoon in summer down their old country road in the woods to the Dairy Dip at the edge of the highway. But choices had been easy then. There had only been vanilla.

  His panic must have been evident on his face because Millie gave him a benevolent pat and opened the case, eyeing it critically. “I think your lady friend would appreciate Rocky Road. I call it a chocolate adventure. Predictably chocolate, but with a surprise.”

  Wait. What? How did she? Was he that transparent?

  She flashed him a beatific smile. “Men like you don’t come in for ice-cream for themselves.”

  “Oh.” His chest grew hot, but Millie didn’t seem to notice his discomfort. “I’ll take the Rocky Road then.”

  At the checkout, he grabbed four decks of new cards.

  The entire drive back to the ranch, his heart kicked hard enough to punch a hole in his chest. Was this wise? Nope. He was skating on very thin ice. But he enjoyed Kate’s company. And he was so damned tired of the oppressive loneliness that rolled over him like an M1A1 Tank. He trudged through the darkness, letting his senses guide him, stopping when his foot reached the top step of Kate’s trailer.

  Sounds from strings being plucked intermittently wafted through the door. He cocked his head listening, using the opportunity to slow his breathing. This was nothing more than cards between two colleagues. Hell, he’d play with Sterling, but most nights Sterling hung with friends in town. And he’d been more than a third wheel at Travis and Elaine’s, so why not? Taking a fortifying breath, he rapped gently on the door. “Kate?” he called. “It’s me. Cash.”

  He heard the sound of a chair moving and something scraping against the floor. The door opened, light flooding out from behind her, acting like a halo. His chest squeezed tight from the loveliness of her. When she smiled, heat raced to his toes turning his insides to jelly, and his voice wavered as he lifted the frozen container. “I got tired of playing solitaire. Feel like rummy and ice-cream?”

  Her answering smile shook him to his core. She motioned him in and stepped aside as he entered. Four candles flickered on the table. Her trailer was the same as his, and yet the little touches she’d added – the candles, a plaid throw on the couch, made it seem homey. Welcoming.

  Pushing aside his feelings, he handed her a paper bag. “I brought new cards. Four decks enough?” His chest rumbled at the mischievous grin she shot him as she took it and the ice-cream and moved to the kitchen. “Can I help dish up?”

  She shook her head as she spooned the dessert into two bowls then turned, eyeing him and the table critically. They’d already established he was too big to squeeze into the small space where the table stood. “We can sit on the floor,” he offered. “You want me to put down the blanket?”

  Her eyes lit at his suggestion, and his gut pulled. He shoved his response aside and grabbed the throw, spreading it on the floor and settling himself against the couch. She sat across from him and handed him a bowl filled twice as full as hers. “Do you not like the flavor?” His stomach dropped. Maybe this had been a bad idea after all.

  She rolled her eyes with a sheepish smile, drawing her hands over her figure. Oh. “Wait. You’re worried about your figure?” Really? He knew beach babes in San Diego that starved themselves, but he wouldn’t have expected Kate to fall into that category. At least not the way she behaved here at the ranch.

  With a sigh, she shook her head and hopped up, grabbing a notebook from the table and sitting back down to scrawl something. Her nostrils flared as she wrote furiously. Shit. Had he pissed her off? She ripped off the page and handed it to him.

  I’m NOT worried about my figure. I love ice-cream. I could eat the whole tub, but you’re twice my size. Did I give you too much?

  “I don’t usually eat sweets,” he confessed, then immediately wished he hadn’t as her face fell. “But this is great.”
She eyed him suspiciously. “And I’m glad you like ice-cream.” She pointed to the paper again, eyebrows raised in question. “And no, you didn’t give me too much.” He’d eat the whole damned thing if it would make her smile again.

  She rubbed her hands together as if to say, “Good,” and began to unwrap the cards. Her hands captivated him as she worked quickly, shuffling the decks. Before she dealt the cards, she scribbled another note and passed it to him.

  What are we betting?

  His mind went to a thousand dirty places. He’d never played strip anything with a woman, but he wasn’t opposed to starting now. His balls pulled tight at the thought of Kate slowly stripping off her sweatshirt, exposing high, perky breasts that would fit perfectly in his hand. Cash swallowed, mouth dry as sawdust. He cleared his throat. “Pennies?” he asked in a voice not his own.

  She nibbled on her lower lip, face screwed up in thought. He’d like to nibble on her lower lip. She raised her eyes and Cash’s breath stopped. This was a woman who knew what she wanted. Keeping her gaze fixed on him, she reached for her notepad, only dropping it to write.

  He laughed out loud at her next note. Loser does the dishes. She handed him another note, a sly look in her eye. For a week. “A week? Game on, sweetheart.” He folded the note, tossing it between them like a gauntlet. “I’ll up the ante. And the laundry.”

  She made a scoffing noise in her throat and smirked.

  “Think you can take me, huh?” he teased.

  Her smirk transformed into a knowing smile as she slowly nodded.

  “Talk is cheap. Deal.”

  Seven rounds later Cash tossed his cards on the blanket, chagrined. “Best of three.”

  Kate’s shoulders shook with mirth.

  “You just got lucky.”

  Her taunting grin told a different story.

  “Prove it. Best of three.” Truth be told, he’d enjoyed himself. The companionable silences, the way her forehead crinkled and she tapped the dent above her top lip when she was concentrating, the banter made up of hastily scribbled notes and wild gesticulations. The little smile at the corner of her mouth that gave away the moment she was going to crush him. All of it. Cash couldn’t remember the last time he’d had fun like this, and the thought of returning to his cold, dark trailer sent a spike of loneliness straight to his gut.